Wednesday, February 16, 2011

I have derailed.

14 days since my last post.

Disgusting.

Frankly, I've stayed away because I haven't had much good to say the last few weeks. It has been cold and snowy, most days I don't even leave the house because I don't want to deal with driving in that shit. Which means not getting to the gym as often. Oh, and let's throw birthday cake in there.

Amazingly, I've managed to lose a few more pounds, and I am back to where I was a month ago when I got sick.

Am I where I thought I would be at this point, when I started November 1? Clearly not. But, I am trying. Every day. Some days are more of a struggle than others.

I am convinced regardless of how much weight I lose, I will always struggle.

6 comments:

  1. It's not that we will always struggle - it's just that it's going to be something that we're conscious of for the rest of our lives. Let's face it, neither of us were blessed with the magic thin figure that we never have to worry about. The reality of getting thin and staying that way, is diligence. Doesn't mean there won't be birthday cake or christmas cookies - just means that we've got to put a limit on that. It's not a struggle my friend, it's just life. :) You can do it, clearly - be proud of that 25 lbs!!! (I'm super proud of you!). One of the things I've really tried to do is get rid of the negative speak about myself. I think when we've got a long way to go, it's hard to see the forest for the trees - you know? It's hard to be proud of what we have done, when we know we have so much more to do. Even I sometimes think that these last 15-18 lbs are never going to go away! Somewhere along the way I learned to be proud of even the small things - I think you should do that too instead of kicking yourself for slips. Slips are slips, they're just life! If you can - try yoga with meditation. I swear it's changed my life. AND supposedly people who practice yoga regularly lose 6% more weight.

    Anyway - congrats on your 25 lbs! Seriously - be proud of yourself and take the time to remind yourself that you're doing the right things. When you slip (I had a cookie today!) accept it, let go of the guilt, and move forward.

    :D (I'll hop off my soapbox now! hah)

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  2. I swear, you are my weight loss angel. You always manage to be the voice of reason when I am creeping towards that bad place of self deprication. You have no idea how much I appreciate your support. :)

    You're totally right though...having a lot to lose, I haven't been happy with the small victories. I have gotten frustrated that I am not THERE yet...and forget that THERE won't happen for a long time, realistically. BUT I am doing something about it, which is more than I could say 4 months ago. And I will get there...

    Please - stay on your soapbox as much as you'd like!!!

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  3. believe me - I was where you are. it's hard to see the light at the end when the end feels so far away. I hate that - and not to quote Miley Cyrus, but it REALLY is the climb. :) Sometimes, I tear up looking back and what I've done - and you'll get there too. It's taken me a year and 4 months (and still counting) to get to where I am. I used to always tell myself this... and believe me, I told myself this a LOT! It didn't take me overnight to get this way and it won't come off overnight either. I spent 25ish years in the bad habits. I figure a few years to reverse that is pretty good. ;-)

    You're doing it - you just gotta stop and be proud of what you HAVE done every now and again.

    I need to hit phase 1 again too. ugh. (really don't wanna! haha )

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  4. No - you're totally right. I lost 60+ in 2005, and it took me til last year to put that back on...disgusting, I know. But the reality is - we get motivated, focused and lose patience when it doesn't go at the speed we want it to. Yet, we're not nearly that aware while it is being packed on.

    I just needed a reality check.

    Phase 1 - Monday. HAVE TO!!!

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  5. alright, I'm gonna go with you. (seriously) I need a detox, bad. though, i let myself have strawberries and blueberries on phase 1. I'm in, starting tomorrow (sunday!)

    go us?! lol

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  6. YES!!! GO US!!!

    I had a great weekend, I really did - not many limitations, other than the things I have eliminated completely from my diet...I did allow myself some things I wouldn't normally - for the sheer fact that I was still celebrating, but now - it's back on track.

    I successfully, feel disgusting and I assure you will feel that way when I wake up tomorrow.

    Hope day 1 went well for you!!!

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